final week of another year of cfb picks aka another year where pt proves he don't know football like he thinks

I'm gonna say this to the football gaaawwwddds, if I win next year I will donate all my winnings to charity and by charity I do mean I will send the money to Tennessee so they can buy a clue that no top notch coach wants to go there anymore! Jon Gruden ain't coming out of retirement ever and on the .00001 percent chance he does it's not to go recruiting, he is an nfl guy. I mean Chip Kelly wouldn't even take your call and Mullet mike Gundy said 'listen I know you guys invented mullets, but why would I leave a school that worships me and is easier to get to playoffs at to go to a school where I got a crazy unrealistic fan base and have to try to out recruit satan'. The funny part is they might luck into a better coach than they deserve if they are smart and go with former qb Tee Martin, granted never been a head coach at all, but fuck is he not their Tressel hire? I mean guy bleeds orange and white, now he is a 'negro' and that fan base is probably 99% trump voters, but if they really want to win they might have to take the bed sheets off and move closer to the 21st century?

So every week since this started I do my picks like this, write the games down, circle game winners i'm positive i'm gonna pick to win and then go look up point spreads and figure out winners in other games and then last order them for confidence. Some weeks i've gone with ordering based on what would help the bucks and ordering lower what would help them out of my buckeye paranoia or the ole hedge every bet theory. If tun was ever in nat title game and it was a pick'em spread i'd bet as much money as I could get my hands on on tun cause they'd lose and i'd be happy or they'd win and i'd be rich!! I'm that kind of nut bag, sometimes, other times i've tried just going with what I believe and being more honest and yeah it hasn't helped. Anyway, that is a long way to say, this week my picks for first time ever were all favorites - every team I picked was also point spread favored to win, crazy. And yes my first instinct was to put teams that winning would hurt bucks slim chance at making the playoffs at the top so i'd get max points if they win or give of max points so they would lose. Then it occurred to me for once not to be (as the veep says) 'that buckeye fan'... I said and I meant all that matters to me is winning that game last week and I meant it! Yes I also want to win nat titles but if I got to choose winning THE game is more important and somehow (luck in qb injuries if we are being honest, O'korn christ looked like me and slack throwing the ball) they bucks moved to 15-2 post 2-10-1 era putting me at 22-16-1 in my life (1979-2017, I don't vacate wins, fuck you ncaa)

Oh side note, did you see who had 175 yds rec and was the grey cup mvp? Free tats Devier Posey!!

this also happened...




Seriously this is Shania riding a dogsled in to perform at halftime of the gray cup... let me remind you of what she used to be doing...



let's just say father time ain't ever winning father of the year from anyone

so all that is to say my picks are ordered from highest point spread as 10 pt game to lowest point spread as my 1 pt game and if crazy happens and bucks win big and get into playoffs yay, but we probably don't deserve it, it probably won't be great (like last year, well unless jt is hurt and our qb that game off bench to lead team to score on 3/4 drives and should been 4/4 drives if not for a missed fg gets to play) but i'll take whatever happens rest of the season cause we won the game that matters. The one thing I don't wanna see is a non playoff satan vs urban matchup which could happen it we win but they jump someone else in? idk, here goes the picks...

10 pt - Toledo wins, for my wife and for the fact they are a 21.5 pt favorite.

9 pt - Fau wins, 10.5 favorite nothing to say but rumors are that free shoes u coach is going to leave to go to tex a&m, huh? why?

8 pt - Clem wins, 9.5 favorite and really starting to get sick to my stomach that clem might go back to back, only loss is bad one but on road when their qb got hurt, fucking go turnover chains!!

7 pt - boise st wins, yeah after losing to this team last week they are an 8.5 favorite? ok, i guess, fuck these teams.

6 pt - ucf wins, 7 pt favorite and at home, damn that ucf/sfla game last week was crazy

5 pt - okla wins, also 7 pt favorite but neutral site vs home game for ucf so put crotch grabbers one lower

4 pt - bucks win, 6.5 pt fav, kind of hilarious how all the teams or alot of teams fan bases will be rooting for the bucks to win but barely and then be like see bigten is a joke send them home!! Well if we can win and especially if we can run on wisky (which we need to do to beat teams, wish coaches had remembered vs iowa) than rest of nation can suck it! Go Bucks!!!

3 pt - so cal wins, 3.5 pt fav, be interesting though, if i'm wrong look for frosh rb for standford to try and make one final heisman statement, I think crotch grabbing, dui running from cops dbag from okla wins, but man if he was black qb and not white could you imagine what peeps would be saying? racism is and always will be alive and strong.

2 pt - aub wins, tough to beat a team twice but faaaaaccccckkkk they steam rolled uga last time and no reason that should change

1 pt - ark st wins, 1pt favorite, go fighting lewenski's?

and my points for tiebreaker are... oh yeah you don't even need them cause i'm such a loser it's almost mathematically impossible I could get back in the money!! well fuck that, bucks win 45-10!! Go Bucks!!!