wk 3 cfb picks

Well shit, I took calculated risk last week that did not pay off with purdon't and illini and i'm fine losing those 3 pts to the field, but those fucking purple cunt hornfrogs can't beat bert and the most fitting nickname of a school ever when you see there wisker faced whore women! WTF? Does the C stand for coward? Seriously I know i'm going to sound like a asshole eastern time zone d bag, but all football west of the est zone is a damn joke!! Save the Petey professional Trojans run of the mid 2ks and the thanks Vince for not letting people call me Mac Cooper all the other nat titles of what the last 25/30 years come from the east? Oh sorry I forgot about Nebraska, ya know when you could still run the option exclusively and win a nat title? Shit i'm just bitter, shocker, oh well lets see if I can get further back in the standings with my own bad picks and not just with bs fucking losses by teams that should stick to selling their bs religion in pour countries and leave the football to real teams!!

10 pt winner, Bama - you put bama in picks and i'm picking them as my 10 every week cause if Satan is gonna win i'm gonna gain from it!! #spokenasachildofthe90's

9 pt winner, Houston - a loss here helps the power 5 and I want non power 5 and independents to go away, just make the 4 super conferences already and then we'll have a true playoff with winner of those 4 (16-20 team) conferences and no bitching ever again and no polls and well they played blah blah.

8 pt winner, Stan - idk, probably will be my tcu pick this week but Trojans suck, vegas line is higher than i'd expect and white Heisman is at home - what could go wrong?

7 pt winner, Nd - still nervous because Kelly has gonna full Irish with drinking problem and can't see he has a true qb and needs to run from this play both bs (had he done that they beat tejas by 10). Look for el prez selfie partner to try and get another prime time win that looks impressive but means jack shit - no rings means no importante

6 pt winner, FSU - again I want this to make these schools push to get in power 5 hopefully soon to be only 4 conferences. Also, qb for l'ville been sick but against who? and fsu rb/offense should shred l'ville - look for a crazy game maybe in the 63-56 range.

5 pt winner, Auburn - I got nothing, going home team and pt spread here

4 pt winner, Miami (fl) - Kudos el prez maybe the best game you've ever put in picks, spread is close so peeps can't complain, there are 'better' matchups with 'known' teams but fuck this is a dare you to pick the little guy who has done it before to do it again against the fallen giant - and seriously Miami, away game at app st? Really? Hey least they'll be a bigger crowd then you get for home games. Miami fans make so cal fans look like diehards!

3 pt winner, Nebraska - why do I do this to myself, why do I think home field will give the pink shirts a chance to maybe have hope again? what is wrong with me?

2 pt winner, UCLA - don't you fuck me bruins!! Ok, well if you are a cheerleader yes please, but wait no i'm married!! No bruin fucking!!

1 pt winner, OSU - I ain't picking against my team and Urban, but well as slack keeps pointing out we are due and Urban is due and the used to call me Big Game Bob is due - F that Bob Cooper this ain't 2k and we might not win out this year with our schedule and our is he over hyped qb, but we will storm norman like W on powered line resting on a coed's titty durning nam!!

bonus pick for free this week - you Colorado, you don't tug on superman's cape, you don't mess around with slim and you sure as hell don't mess around with a big jim crazy nose picker/eater thug life and expect not to get cut in 100 places and stabbed in 100 more!! when this games over you won't even have the soles of your feet left!! Tun 63 Kordell Back Mountains - 0!!

There ya have it, I must say even if my picks suck in results I drop mic the shit out of them in rambling non sense with occasion funny!! Peace i'm out!!

wk 2 cfb picks for 2016

Well week one was everything it was hyped up to be and more, so to follow up that big ole 72oz juicy steak cfb scheduling brings us the bird crapped on the cake of week 2 games!! On up side this gives El Prez his annual opportunity to appease his so cal (EX) in-laws and simultaneously torture me with having to pick the fucking Aztecs game! Marshal Faulk ain't there, I ain't care!!

Ok, let's just hope I don't ruin the whole season this week cause I have no idea on these games...

10 pt, L'ville winner - only team between Tom Herman and a playoff spot after last weeks upset.

9 pt, Iowa winner - I mean he did just get a nice fat extension. I don't know how every girl that is a 4 but fucks and sucks like a 10 isn't living in Iowa because they will show you a billionaire life for Roseanna level effort.

8 pt, TCU winner - Bert oh Bert, had enough yet? They want you to win, not start to look like the school mascot you bright red fat piece of shit.

7 pt, Tenn winner - or what ever you wanna tell the fans happens as the seat views for that game are terrible!! First row of stadium won't be able to tell wtf is going on and certainly they will have zero problems with the refs mic!!

6 pt, SDSU winner, hope i'm wrong!!!

5 pt, Miss St winner, they have to rebound right?

4 pt, Pitt winner, Penn st better find a way to pull this upset or Franklin better update the ole resume. Kind of hard to believe all the bad luck befallen the nittny lions after allowing and continually honoring a man that at best was clueless to and at worst turned a blind eye to a pederast roaming the bathrooms of central PA for 3 plus decades.

3 pt, Utah winner,  should be my one pt game and maybe best match up of the weekend but i'm picking some upsets and putting them in 1/2 spots.

2 pt, Illinois winner, so b1g got a little something going last weekend and maybe looking to extend this weekend? Well doubtful and reality will come back and cost me 3 pts, but fuck it - here's to my dad and his b1g homer attitude this week!!

1 pt, Purdon't winner, should have seen this coming after that last pick. Seriously the FACT (as slack would say) that two b1g teams are 6 and 9 pt home dogs (coming off wins in week 1) to a non power 5 (cincy for now) and a basketball school (nc) is the most "stop voting a bum like ferentz coach of the year and recognize the big coaches in your conference" middle finger vegas can give a conference!!


Well there it is, fingers crossed my picks will land soft and gentle and shine, shine like the polished gold on ole dirty harbum's fresh chainz!!