Bowl Picks!!

Bowl picks baby!! No disclaimer needed now, you should all no how bad I am at picking these games. I will say I’m better at this than the BigTen is at naming – well – anything. Leaders and Legends? Really? Wow! So bad, so so so bad! And 18 post season Bigten football awards, that’s right 18 and all named after two football coaches or players. In the spirit of xmas, they used players/coaches from the past (univ of Chicago) and the future (Nebraska). Coach of the year, Champ game MVP, Coach of the yr, and off/def player of year awards are fine, but do we need the leadership, humanitarian, freshman, off line, def line, qb, db, lb, wr, te, kicker, and punter of the year award? Come on; second how linebacker of the year is not named after a penn st (lineback U) or Ohis St (the real linebacker U, look at the names)? Oh and qb or year is named after guys from Purdue? Take that Brady! For those of you that count here is a list of how schools are represented by number of guys honored:

Osu – 5
Mich – 4
Wisc – 4
Msu – 3
Psu – 3
Purdue
Ill – 3
Minn – 3
Iowa – 2
N’west – 2
Ind – 2
Neb – 1
Univ of Chicago – 1

So bucks are on top at least, but I’d argue could be more, how’s Iowa feel being with Ind and the purple gang. I could go on, but I need to move on before I get to the eyesore that is the new logo.

Hold on to your whale tales ladies, this is already long and is going to get much longer. Make sure you have the time and an empty bladder (that’s for you Steve) I’m pulling no punches for this season finally.

Note a * next to pick means I picked the other team in my office bracket.

New “you won’t do the job whitey so stop complaining” Mexico – BYU wins, what can I say I love Mormons, you gotta give credit to a group of people that make multiple sexual partners seem painful, odd, and unappealing.

uDrove Humanitarian Bowl – I didn’t F with that name, they actually have sponsorship for a humanitarian bowl! Even if you have never heard of uDrove. Fresno st wins, congrats Fresno and n ill your present is a trip to Idaho, hows that feel?

Beef ‘O’ Brady’s St Petersburg Bowl – Someone stole my thunder or is just F-ing with me, the bowl name has beef and Brady in the name and is in Petersburg? What did Richardsville already have the Arby’s special sauce bowl? * S. Miss wins maybe?

MAACO Las Vegas bowl – I got nothing on this Boise st wins, duh, enjoy your but wooping Utah, ‘visualize and attack’ Bobby!!!

S.D. County ‘does California have any left?’ Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl Navy wins!! I’m a navy guy from a navy family! Go Navy!

Sheraton Hawaii bowl – Hawaii, duh. Tulsa will win the eye bugging out of our heads game.

Pizza Pizza smoke a bowl and it still tastes like shit Bowl - * Fla International wins, and Toledo is so excited to travel all the way to Detroit! Seriously do they actually go a week before for festivities? Or do they just go the morning of the game?

AdvoCare V100 Independence Bowl – I think we gave our independence away to the satanic advertising people decades ago, should call this the make sure you hold down those brown people, I need a new Ipad Bowl! To political? Anyway, Gtech wins the battle of the triple option.

Champs Sports bowl - * Nc state wins, this could be one of the better bowl games between 2 schools from conferences that need to be combined into one decent conference.

Insight ‘I’ve got Glaucoma’ Bowl – Missouri pounds the all 2 of our rb’s transferred and the other is injured, and our wr is going to Leavenworth, and our def line just is trying to stay healthy for the draft, how does Kirk Ferentz have multiple B10 coach of the year awards and tress has zero F-ing Joke-eyes from Iowa! Seriously what a F-ing joke!

Military Bowl presented by Northrop ‘we make lots of stuff to kill’ Grumman bowl- *Maryland wins, ecu pulls lots of bowl upsets traditionally, but so does Jabba’s boys.

Texas Bowl - * The Zooker wins to save his job, both these teams screwed me all year so I split on them. Nothing to joke about on the Texas bowl, simple name, they use death penalty a lot, love you Texas!

Valero ‘f u Valero I’m a 7/11 guy’ Alamo bowl - * zona wins, I going def in one poll and off in the other, this should be a good game, who will make the last stand? Heheheh

Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl (at least Obama hasn’t cut funding for naming rights on bowl games yet?) Smu wins, told you I’m a Navy guy, oh and army deff bad bad bad against pass and Smu passes a lot!

New Era Pinstripe Bowl – More shit in Yankee stadium, nothing like a crap bowl game where a beer will cost you a month’s car payment on a Kia. I’ll say Kst wins, soft butter!

Franklin American Martgage Music City ‘tarp’ bowl – Nc wins, and tenn is just happy for the free gift bag with all the shower luffa’s to help clean themselves.

Bridgepoint Education Holiday Bowl – yes I agree you can clearly see walking around that education has been on a holiday for awhile; glad it finally has a bowl game to celebrate. Nebraska wins

Meineke Car Care bowl – I hate you Clemson, you will win. Hope the south never rises again, did you see how your peeps act in Borat? Nice!

Hyundai Sun Bowl – Stop I can’t take it, the Korean car company is sponsoring the bowl with two programs that have been acting as if they are run by Kim Jong Ill for years. As long as someone feeds the Ethiopian QB from Miami and el paso has no wind storms for the irish it will be a good experience for all, look for ND to finally get off the bowl schnide.

AutoZone Liberty bowl – uhhhhhh, liberty bowl, bad memories, happy thoughts happy thoughts, ok I’m better. Uga wins, who cares.

Chick-fil-A ‘ponchot’ bowl - * S. car wins, should be a great game.

Ticketcity bowl, to bad Persa is hurt, N’west would roll with him, but will loose without

Outback ‘ can you speak up? I can’t hear you?’ bowl – Fla beats Penn st so bad and Joe pa doesn’t care because the game is over before dinner at 3pm!

Capital One Bowl – Bama wins big and the big fraud starts to feel some pressure for well having another bad bowl season.

Gator bowl – Michigan wins, and richrod says ‘you raise me up….’ D rob is scary good, I predict next yr if richrod returns he well pretty much same as this yr cause he is small and will get injured and that def will still be bad.

Rose bowl Game presented by Walmart tv’s, how offensive is that, second rate sponser for a second rate game. Wisconsin, says thanks for coming TCU, no you don’t belong.

Tostitos Fiesta bowl – Okla wins, finally getting up for a lesser opponent and not laying an egg and no one cares, way to go Boomer.

Discover Orange bowl- Stan wins in the you better get him while you can bowl. I’ll be happy if you don’t, but you know you should t.u.n.

Allstate ‘do you sell SEC insurance’ Sugar bowl - * Bucks win, but I’m not confident and split my pick, hope they use time well like last year and T.P. plays well.

For those of you that will crush the bucks if we lose and bang on tress some facts for you:

First and foremost 9-1 Nuff said bite me!!

1 nat title
3 nat title games
1 heisman
7 Bigten tittles, 3 outright
Without this years numbers
25 1st team all Americans
59 1st team all bigten
5 Academic All Americans
5-4 in bowl games (hopefully 6-4 soon)
4-3 in BCS bowls (hopefully 5-3 soon)
13 (hopefully 14) wins verse Major Non Conf opponents

Not a bad 10 seasons, huh? Be thankful for what you have and remember always 2-10-1 and zero nat champs with great great talent.

Godaddy.com bowl – * mid tenn st wins – nice to have something to do on jan 6th while killing thy liver. Seriously this should be called the your still in the running for the money bowl, or you need an intervention bowl.

The it’s still not on Verizon so you you’re stuck with our shit service Cotton bowl – Lsu wins, big.

BBVA ‘don’t need one cause I’m not watching’ Compass bowl - * pitt wins, in honor of the stache

Kraft fight hunger ‘thru making you fat and diabetic’ bowl - * Nevada wins Isn’t san fran the city trying to make it so you can’t even buy food like Kraft mac n cheese cause it’s so unhealthy, but it’s the companies home base?! God I love capitalism.

Tostitos BCS championship game – This has been paid for already, Cam and the tigers win and celebrate for about 4 yrs till it is vacated. “My dad does more behind the scenes than people can know” Cause you won’t tell us and don’t want us to know! Score 55-45 in a fun game, don’t miss it, both offenses are good!

So there you have it, another great year see ya in the fall for more college football. And for you few loyal followers see you next time I have something stupid to rant about. Anybody else tired, I am, I need a dark chocolate kiss! That sounded gay, I meant the purple little treats on my coworker’s desk, shit that was gay to! Oh well, I just want some sugar, damn!

Ohh, what a morning, thank 'evolution?' for Pearl Jam

I’m not even close to going hungry, maybe my mouth is to decadent? Maybe I’ve listened to too much PJ radio today? NEVER! Maybe having my head about bitten off today and not reacting was my good deed today? Maybe I deserved to have my head bitten off for not coming up with a more gentle way to say this is going to suck, but we have to do it? Maybe, ebyam? Maybe I’ll have something better to say later? Possibly I’ll never really have anything better too say or maybe I’m not really saying anything? Are these just ‘footsteps’? If I did anything it was because of you…. Problem is you is me (in the song). Trippy huh? If my wishlist was known, it would say I’d just like to say something profound, even if only profound to one other person. The best things you read or hear or see are the things that make you still and quiet, even if for only a moment. They say I will force you to think about this; rather you can comprehend it or use it or need it; you will stop and think. Sometimes those change you and then you change right back. Sometimes they change you and you are never the same, disfigured. If a person lost 100 lbs and got in marathon shape they have been disfigured, the figure they took before is not what they are now – disfigured. Words can have such great power, but often because we imply power to them thru context or circumstance. Bet most would not consider disfigured a positive word. Maybe it isn’t and my use (definition) is wrong? Who knows? Please don’t say him! We don’t talk, the lines of communication are fuzzy for us. Maybe he’ll tell me later, when it can’t do me any good.

I want to buy Hanukkah stamps to mail our chritmas cards! I won’t because I love my wife and her not wanting to kill me. It would be funny, but some jokes are not worth what it does to the people whose heads it would fly over.

I am the Walrus

Fuck You Mark David Chapman!!

30 yrs is a long long time and it still sucks!

Rip John